I Didn't Mean It Emma
by Yellowbuggedsavior
Summary: (MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH) Emma and Regina get into an argument, Regina uses something personal Emma has been struggling with accepting against her. Emma leaves the house hurt, not realizing that was the last time they would see each other. I suck at summaries, sorry! Please read it though! I wrote it on my Wattpad account but wanted to share here because I am proud of it. (reposted)


**WARNINGGGGG: Major Character Death and HELLA angsty!**

 **(oh my god guys, I'm so sorry for this one. I legit cried most of the time I wrote it.)**

 **(just in case you missed it though, MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, like DEATH DEATH not come back to life and they all good. no.)**

"Really Emma, is that what your parents told you?" Regina said in a loud angry voice, they had been fighting for a little under an hour about the smallest thing that escalated into their biggest fight. "Last time I checked you didn't have to listen to your parents, especially ones that discarded you and put you in a wardrobe sending you off to a life of horrible foster homes, one after the other!" As soon as the words were out Regina regretted them. Emma's childhood was always off limits in fights just like Regina being the evil queen was for Emma. The only thing is Regina just broke that rule, and along with it she saw her fiancé's shattered heart.

Emma swallowed hard, then without a word she turned to leave, she wouldn't let Regina see her cry.

"Emma wait," Regina spoke in a wobbly voice. "I-I didn't mean it, it just came out."

The blonde stopped walking, but didn't turn to face the other woman. "I think-" she started but her voice gave out, "I think that makes it worse." With that being said Emma started walking again and headed out the door leaving Regina standing there loathing herself for even thinking those words and even more for spitting them out in anger.

Emma got in her bug and drove out of the drive way, she didn't know where she was going. All she knew is that she couldn't stay at Regina's anymore. Yes she calls it Regina's again, it didn't feel like home anymore. She couldn't believe that Regina had said the words she had thought in her mind for the past few years since she found her parents. She has tried to forgive them, she really has. She even pretends it is okay so she doesn't hurt them anymore, but she has never gotten over the fact that they gave her away to save everyone else. What about her? She told Regina that in confidence one night, feeling like she needed-even wanted to open up to her. They would be married soon, so why not give Regina the chance to back out with all her damaged laundry laying out for her to see. She never once thought that Regina would use it against her in a fight, especially with so much hate and anger in her voice.

She continued driving around town, stuck in her head, not even realizing the tears streaming down her face. It was around sunset, so everything was beautiful. The town looked orange-y red and there were few people walking around, everyone was heading home from work for the day. She stopped at a stop sign and just sat there for a moment, taking a deep breath and trying to calm down. She knows that she probably should have stayed, maybe even yelled back, but no matter how hard she was hurt she wouldn't want Regina to hurt equally.

That's when she decided to go back home and sleep on the couch, let Regina know she wasn't running away but that she was pissed and hurt.

Fate had different plans though, she didn't notice the car flying down the road from her left going about 80 mph. They didn't seem to care about the stop sign or the fact that there was a person, Emma, about to cross the road in their direct path.

Emma looked to her left and she just felt her heart drop, she looked down to her ring and then back up at the car coming in her direction. There is no way that Regina would know Emma was heading back to the house. There is no way for Emma to let Regina know that she forgives her and she's sorry for leaving the house. There is no way that Emma can tell Regina one more time how much she wants to marry her and start a life as Mrs. Swan-Mills. All of that stops, all her thinking stops the moment the car crashes into her driver side door.

She dies on impact.

Regina stood by the front door expecting Emma to never leave in the bug, she just waited for the blonde to turn around and come back inside. Maybe just give her the silent treatment or yell back, who is she kidding, Regina knows it would have been the silent treatment. When Emma left, she was hurt not pissed. She hurt the one person she loves most, the person she wants to spend the rest of her life with and make memories with. She wants to grow old with the savior and laugh at all her stupid and immature jokes while they watch Henry become an adult and start a family of his own. She wants to have designated date nights with her wife because once you get older the spontaneity of romance isn't as spontaneous, but that's okay because they will be with each other.

After a while she moved to the couch, having made coffee to keep her awake. It had gotten dark now and there was no sight of the blonde. She had been sure that Emma would have come back home by now and let her know she hadn't left, that she was still here but pissed, but there was only silence. She heard Henry walk out of his room and to the bathroom, the telltale noises of the flush and then him scurrying back into his room to listen to music and read.

There was a weird feeling, it felt like heart break. Only Regina didn't know why she felt it all at once so suddenly like she just lost half of her heart. Tears sprung to her eyes involuntarily and she wiped them away confused and stood up. Her eyebrows furrowed as she started to sob uncontrollably, not even noticing her son running towards her in a panic. She could see his blurry outline saying 'mom, are you okay? What's wrong? You're scaring me' but she never heard a word of it. It was like someone had died, it felt like when Daniel died but maybe even worse.

"Mom, Where is Ma?" Henry asked and Regina heard it like she was swimming under water and he was just in reach of being heard. He was looking around for her like Emma was just expected to walk out of the kitchen and help him. He didn't know Emma had left the house, or that they had gotten into a fight, he must have had his headphones in at the time.

Regina looks up at him, her little prince who turned into a knight, and took a deep breath so she could speak. "She left the house, we- I said something horrible and she left to get some air." She looked around, still not understanding her overwhelmingly sad feeling. This has never happened to her before, she knew she was worried about Emma being upset, she even felt guilty for being so rude but she wasn't sad.

That made Henry seem more nervous, the fact that Emma wasn't in the house safe with them. "Did you call her?" He asked as he pulled out his cellphone to try and reach her, she always answered his calls no matter what mood she was in. Henry was her number one priority and she would always put on an 'I'm fine' voice for him.

She didn't answer. He called again. Again no answer.

Regina watched the whole scene, each time he called and Emma didn't answer Henry's nervousness multiplied. "Henry, what are you thinking?" She was holding her hand to her heart still because she still felt the ache.

"Mom. Ma isn't answering," He stops and looks at Regina. "She always answers me, you know that." Starting to frown as tears fill his eyes, "You feel random sadness and heartbreak because Emma is your true love." His voice cracks when he finally said what he's been thinking this whole time. He never told Regina or Emma that he found out they were true loves, he kept it to himself and was going to tell them on their wedding day as a gift. He found out when he was writing a chapter about them as the author.

It didn't click with Regina right away, her eyes widened when he told her that they are true love. They some how got even wider when she realized what he was implying, "No." She now knows how it feels to have every piece of her soul and heart just shatter into fragments and dust. She stood up and ran to the front door, ran by the empty spot that used to have a bright yellow bug sitting in it and stopped on the street as she looked down it hoping to see a bug coming back this way. She didn't just hope, she begged it, she pleaded for it. Henry followed her out there, trying to call Emma again to see if he had misread the whole situation and Emma just had her phone on silent as she drove. He knew it was unlikely, she hated having her phone on silent and always groaned when he left his that way. _"What's the point of having a phone if you can't hear when I call you, kid?"_ His memory stopped in its tracks when Emma's phone got to voice mail again and he hangs up.

"I'm calling grandpa," he dials the number and turns looking down the street in the opposite way his mom was.

"Hello?" David answers sleepily since it was his night off, he must have just fallen asleep. "Henry, what's wrong?"

"Grandpa is Emma at the loft? She and mom had a fight and now we can't get a hold of her and mom's heart hurts and she's freaking out, we are standing in the road, and I'm scared that it's because her and Ma are true loves and Emma got hurt." Henry was rattling off a whole list of worries while on the other side of town David was out of bed and getting dressed with a confused Snow watching him and trying to find out what was happening.

"Henry, I'm on my way kiddo. Get your mom inside or at least off the road."

Henry nods even though his Gramps couldn't see it. He walks more to his mom and grabs her wrist, "mom let's go back inside."

Regina shakes her head and mumbles a sad no without even opening her mouth. This pain she feels is agonizing, she feels so alone and she's so worried for Emma. What if she feels this way too, adding what Regina said about her parents would be enough to destroy the blonde. "I need to find Emma," She cries and doesn't look at her son.

Henry was scared and didn't know what he was supposed to do. "Mommy... please," he hadn't used 'mommy' since he was a little kid causing Regina to turn to him in shock and notice his face. She was torn, she knew Henry wanted her to go inside, but she also felt she needed to search everywhere possible for her fiancé. She nods and reluctantly follows him into the house.

David got in his car, Snow at his side, and drove towards Regina's house.

He sees the lights first, the red and blue of an ambulance. Then he sees the firefighters to help pry car open, they didn't seem to be in a rush. Charming looked over to his wife, who immediately had tears in her eyes. They silently communicated, hoping it to be anyone but their daughter. Anyone but that beautiful blonde woman that has been dealt a horrible life and was just about to get her happiness. When they got closer the notices the bug, the bright yellow contraption that their daughter loved more than life itself. It had always brought a smile to her face every time she saw it and David had always wanted to ask her what her first thought was when she saw it.

"Charming," Snow said in an agonizingly sad voice. She hoped her husband would turn to her and say that she doesn't actually see their daughter car crushed and flipped as people try and get a limp looking body free. She hoped her husband would look at her and tell her that their daughter was going to be able to live happily ever after with the woman who used to terrorize her but now brings the most genuine smile to her daughters face that she's ever seen. She wants him to tell her that she has more time to make up for all the heart ache Emma had to go through because of her and that she had more time to get Emma to forgive her for giving her up. None of those things come though because Charming's eyes are glued to the scene in complete and utter devastation. He knew his little princess was trapped in that car and from the looks of it no longer living.

He barely recollects putting his truck in park and walking towards the crash, nor does he recall Graham stopping him from getting any closer to the scene. What he does remember is the way he tries to push his way past the huntsman to get to his daughter, but the scruffy man doesn't let him having seen the wreck up close himself and almost getting sick. It almost didn't feel real, he felt like the world was moving in slow motion. His wife was on her knees next to him being held by Ruby, who had shown up a moment ago, as his daughter's body was pulled out of her car and covered with a sheet. He screams but doesn't hear it, he doesn't even know if sound actually came out or not. Snow was sobbing uncontrollably against her best friend, the sound of charming's heart break not helping. They had just found their little girl and within a second she was ripped away from them again.

The ambulance took her body away to the hospital even though there was nothing they could do. Graham drove David to Regina's and Ruby drove Snow to the hospital.

Regina was sitting on the couch, her hair was in a low ponytail with her glasses on. Crying and contacts don't mix so she had taken them out once she made it inside. She was wearing leggings and one of Emma's big pajama shirts as she waited for David to come and help look for her savior. She was starting to get annoyed with how long he was taking, doesn't their daughter mean anything to them?

The brunette had been denying what Henry thought was happening to her and supposedly had happened to Emma. She had it in her head that Emma was just at Granny's getting a cocoa or at the Inn for the night to teach Regina a lesson about using personal demons as fighting words.

There was a knock on her door.

Her heart leapt and she raced to the door, expecting Emma even though she knew Emma would have just used her key or walked in. Instead she found David and Graham standing in front of her looking horribly sad and like they are holding unwanted news in their mouths. "Did you find her?" She asked almost desperately with hope in her eyes, "Where is she?"

"Regina-" Graham started but was interrupted.

"Was she at Granny's?" Regina smiled, "She really likes the cocoa that Granny makes. It comforts her when she's sad."

David lets out a whimper of sadness wishing more than anything that Regina was right. He wished he had the little bit of hope left that Emma was alive and well somewhere.

"Regina," Graham started again. "Emma was in a car accident, she-"

"No," Regina says in a panic and has tears in her eyes. "Is she at the hospital? Is she okay?" Moving more into her house to put on shoes and grab her purse, she doesn't need her purse why did she grab her purse. No one noticed Henry sitting on the stairs listening to the conversation, he could tell Emma wasn't at the hospital getting better. His mom would be able to tell too if she wasn't in complete denial of the whole situation. Henry cries silently for both his mothers, he wishes that he had gotten more time with Emma. Maybe gotten to know her a little better.

Graham lets his shoulders sad and his head fall slightly that he didn't get done telling Regina the worst news of her life. "Regina," he starts softly. "Emma isn't getting better. She died on impact."

Regina stopped moving, her whole body froze and Grahams last four words played back in her head on repeat. They were just going to keep playing until it sunk in and she realized what happened. Henry sees the devastation across his mom's face and he breaks down into tears which causes Graham and David to both look up and finally notice that he has been listening this whole time. It takes Regina a little longer but that's only because she couldn't hear anything but Graham telling her that her fiancé, her true love, was dead. She was gone. When she looked up at Henry a few tears fell down her cheeks by the force of the move. She immediately walked over to him and pulled him into a hug, she was numb, she hated this feeling. She just wants Emma to walk back into the house so she can apologize and they can sit down and watch the Princess Bride again since it's Emma's favorite movie. Regina will pretend not to watch Emma say the movie word for word and Emma will pretend to not know any of the words. Instead she has a sobbing 17 year old and two grown men that look like they are about to break as well. "Go," she states which makes David and Graham look up at her in confusion. "You've done what you came here for, now you may leave," Regina states coldly but with a crack in her voice.

Henry moves out of her arms after a minute, "I need to see." They all look at him not understanding what the tearful boy is saying. "I need to see proof grandpa, Graham. Take me to see her. I-I want to see my ma," the last part comes out in a heart shattering sob but Regina and the guys both know that if Henry says that's what he needs then that is what he needs. Regina isn't ready for that so she kisses his head and lets him get up to leave with the others. She's left to sit on the stairs by herself, the silence is deafening in her ears.

Standing up slowly, Regina walks the rest of the way up the stairs and to her bedroom. She has a permanently defeated face on as her eyes slowly roam over the room. Small things showing Emma's presence in the room. Her red jacket hanging on the back of Regina's vanity chair. Some of her clothes sprawled out on the floor, yet they still aren't in a place that would be an inconvenience for Regina throughout the day. Emma's side of the bed was still wrinkled from her body laying over the comforter that she was on right before the fight had gotten heated enough for them to take it downstairs and away from Henry.

She walks over to the bed and just looks down at the spaces for them, this was their bed.

 _"Regina, stop it." Emma whines in a sleepy voice but couldn't help the smile that appeared. "I'm trying to sleep, you know what normal people do this early in the morning."_

 _Regina laughs at the childlike behavior that she found so endearing in the savior, "did you just call me abnormal?" She pushes a piece of Emma's hair to flow back away from her face since she wanted to see her._

 _Emma doesn't make any movement, maybe just a hint more of a smirk like she knew what she was about to say would push the brunette's buttons, "If the shoe fits."_

 _"Emma!" Regina said with a pout, "I'm not, not normal. I just prefer mornings and want to spend them with my beautiful fiancé, not alone."_

 _The blonde's eyebrows rose slightly in remembrance of the night before, Regina had proposed. Emma opens one of her eyes to look at her hand and said in a dreamy voice, "That wasn't a dream?"_

 _Regina smiled brightly at her savior, "no dear that was all very much real." She was still brushing Emma's hair back even though it wasn't in the way, she just liked touching her._

 _"Good," she sits up enough to reach Regina's lips and kisses her softly. Regina could feel Emma smile into the kiss, which was always her favorite, knowing she made her happy._

Regina had a smile on her face until she came out of the memory and back to reality, her heart nearly stopping making it hard to breath. She just wanted her Emma back, her beautifully walled up, childish Emma. She was scared to touch the blonde's side of the bed, what if she messes it up and she forgets how Emma used to sleep there. Regina had tears streaming down her face as she curled up on her side facing Emma's side and putting her hand out so it's almost over on her side. "Emma," Regina cries out in a broken voice. "I'm so so sorry Emma, I-I didn't mean it. I didn't mean those words when we were fighting. I love you so much-" she starts sobbing, "-It hurts so much! Please come back." She reaches her hand over and grips the blanket pulling it to her face hoping it will smell like her. "Why did you have to leave, you told me you wouldn't leave me." Her whole body rocks at the force of the sobs leaving her body, "Emma I didn't mean it! Please just come back home! I'm sorry, please, I need you." She lets her body jerk with sobs at the loss of the only person who made her think having a dark side doesn't mean she doesn't get to be happy. The loss of her best friend and mother of her child. She would no longer be able to watch any of Emma's favorite movies that would always be watched on movie night with her and Henry because neither of them had the heart to tell her no with how excited she got. There would be no more lasagna night family dinners and then later in the middle of the night finding Emma sneaked down stairs to eat the left overs because she couldn't stop thinking about it. There would be no more coming home from work late and finding a poorly made dinner that she eats anyways because it was the thought that counted and the megawatt smile that Emma wore to show how proud she was of the meal.

All of that was gone.

She was gone.

Emma was gone.

And Regina was alone.


End file.
